Thursday, 7 November 2013

Crackman: A new kind of hero for a new kind of society

Look up in the sky, its a bird, its a plane , no its something higher than that!
" Crackman saves a dozen normal size crackheads by blocking the shooter"

If Rob Ford is not going to stand down, he better gear up. Crackhouses are notorious for stabbings and shootings. We cannot have the Mayor of Toronto taking unnecessary risks. I think his chances of re election would soar if the public knew he was taking some precautions, and was not just another reckless crackhead. He needs a new suit.

Would Rob Ford in a bulletproof suit not be a super hero, Crackman. The Mayor of Toronto summons him by drinking a 26er of Vodka. Of course the Vodka becomes very popular with Crackmans endorsement, and Crackman uses the money to build subways. What a fiscally responsible hero!

Imagine the headlines:

"Crackman, if your a bad guy without crack, you dont want to see him in a drunken stuper"

" Crackman saves a dozen normal size crackheads by blocking the shooter"

" Crackman takes down a pursesnatcher by throwing his crack pipe on the sidewalk, the glass shards cut through the villains flip flops"

Top Ten Bob Dylan covers by Crackman
1) Shelter from the Fords (credit David Ray)
2)Tangled up in a Drunken Stupor
3) Like a Rolling Crack Rock
4) Transit Plan number 61 revisited
5)Vodka in Escalade
6) Sandra, Bill Blair and the diamond Crack Pipe
7)All along the crack houses
8)Most likely you will vote for me, and I will get high
9) Drug dealer from Etobickoe
10) Desperation Row

Comming Soon the Crackmobile, if you have some ideas put them in comments

5 comments:

  1. "Crackman saves a dozen normal size crackheads by blocking the shooter"

    This is the funniest thing I've read all month.

    I was just thinking the other day, after downing a bottle of J&B then doing some crack, we need more superheroes in the world

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    1. Thanks 29, I moved the caption under the picture.

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  2. That's hilarious! I suppose he is going to Crackdown on the Crack problem. By the way, I did not know you had another blog, I am now following.

    -James

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    1. Thanks James you put me into double digits!

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  3. For sure the CRACKMOBILE will be green wheels, powered by meth.

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