Did I say six years its more like 26 but who is counting. Based upon the last six years I would say having to hire a French coach is the excuse.
Well due to budget cuts the Analytics guy was given the job of making the player excuse statements to be used in the post game scrum, after all they never used him for analytics anyway. After they fired him he leaked them to Julian Assage.
Of Course the coach has the first excuse " they traded away PK nobody asked me!"
Radalov (Ché) - " Strippers. Montreal Strippers take your breath away, next year wife says I am playing in Winnipeg"
Patchority (Patches) " I never played Jr Hockey, the NCAA is for pussies"
Alex Galchenyuk (gCHuck) " Coach does not understand, I am not a Russian, I am not a left winger"
David Da vid DESHARNAIS (DDD) " you try falling down and getting up 300 times in 28 mins including double the frequency on the PP"
SVEN ANDRIGHETTO (gHetto) " I am only 23, coach does not even learn your name until you hit 25"
ANDREI MARKOV "A" (Vodkov) " I nearly 40 years old, the arrogant fuckface has me playing 30 mins a night"